Suicide prevention day is really not my thing. Especially, as past couple of years, more precisely, the past decade and more extensively past half-decade, I have been consuming fictional and based on real events films and books about people who have committed suicide or do commit suicide, or at least throughout the whole story flirting with the idea. It's not just about films and books, even biographies and sometimes even living individuals that I follow seem to be preoccupied with suicide as I have been ... [I hope, it would be unnecessary to say "and am" by the Lord's leave.]
I don't think, every person who commits suicide or claims to be considering such a future path is someone who fits into the category of "us", which is loosely labeled as "borderline", but I think people who do fit in our group are quite different, perhaps fundamentally different by design and by the impacts of their childhood environment on their psyche.
I'll be publishing more materials on this theme primarily on https://selfsense.xyz, but as the web address suggests, there is something about self sense at play here. Most people don't understand what it feels like to have _flimsy self-sense _, just as most people won't understand how it would feel like to have no eyes and ears. A relevant example to this post is numerous encounters where I was surprised by my audience's expectation that "if you yourself don't think your idea is good enough to be advertised, why should I bother myself about it?" They don't understand that a flimsy self-sense means you are exceptionally dependent on others to consider yourself of any value, not to mention anything you have done of any value to be advertised by yourself. By that I'm not trying to say you are unable to judge your works based on some professional criteria, whether it is in arts, science or whatever field, what I mean is being unable to attribute part of that value creation to oneself and take credit and presume accountability and ownership about it. Part of that accountability and ownership is demonstrated in a natural willingness to "spread the word."
The more I have loved someone, the more alike my treatment of myself to the way I have treated that individual, so, in fact, barely I talked about artists that I really love and their works to friends and acquaintances; I do refer to their works in professional settings, but barely ever when there is no "professional" excuse for doing so.
But no more theorizing, pondering, wondering and brooding, let's take some action and go against the typical behavior pattern: by the change of the date from yesterday to today, Ryn Weaver released a single titled "Reasons Not To Die (Demo)", and I think the word (Demo) in the name stands for the fact that flimsy self-sense makes you never consider your work worth enough to be "released and causing you to become the recipient of affection and admiration in the light of it", I mean of course the brilliant extremely gifted soul as Aryn/Erin is, she can easily improve on her previous works and perhaps some may benefit improvements to meet her own criteria of professional satisfaction with a work, but I think people with self-sense use the term "-th edition" and do it in the metadata and not in the title of their work.
If you still aren't persuaded to purchase your copy, give my shot at copy-writing a try:
Beyoncé is considered the "queen" and perhaps and her shitty style works like "run the world (girls)" considered empowering women, while, frankly, putting sexy young females in leotard performing seductive moves on the stage is not empowerment to anything but perhaps promiscuity. I mean, seriously, if you really want to empower girls to take on political authority perhaps one should have written a female edition of Niccolò Machiavelli's "the prince", or Karl Marx's "the communist manifesto", otherwise I can't remember any revolutionary men, or any historical male authority figure referring to having watched six-pack men in tongs performing homosexually arousing body movements having shaped his vision for his future. But I don't wish to push you further down the lane of despair about state of the art popular-music, so you end up with even fewer Reasons To live among the people of our time. While the variety and quantity of released albums and upcoming artists seem to hit the roof, hence not leaving the slightest prospect for ingenuity, Ryn Weaver is a hard-proof that a Nick Drake-style talent reshaping a genre by his novel music isn't once a millennium occurrence. I believe people who crowned someone like Beyoncé and left Ryn Weaver to title herself "suicide queen" in her Reasons Not To Die should be horribly, dreadfully ashamed of themselves. Especially if you are one of the 20-somethings who can't dare to call him or herself an "adult" rather a "childhood survivor," don't miss the opportunity of figuring out your Reasons Not To Die before it's too late! As for mine, Ryn Weaver, her creativity, style, and the artist behind the pen-name are non-negotiable items on my list of Reasons Not To Die.